IC INBOX

[maskintape]

It's Tim. I guess I'm busy, so... Leave a message.

Comments

[maskintape]

I've been coping all my life, man, I'm pretty sure your brother will need you way more than I will. Plus, you know. Me and my guilt issues.

[armoured]

This wasn't an offer, Tim, it was a promise.

[Which means shut up and accept that he's not going anywhere, so shove those guilt issues aside and be friended at.]

[maskintape]

Awesome. Be right back, I need to go grab some of those signs from that one house. The ones that say stuff about not needing a babysitter?

[ Shut up Tim you absolutely do need a babysitter on occasion ]

[armoured]

Don't be ridiculous, I'm not babysitting you. But you're a friend, and I'd never forgive myself if I went home and left anyone, not just you, to fend for themselves here if the dangers weren't dealt with.

[He hesitates, but:]

Besides, we don't know for sure yet that you won't be able to go someplace else, we might find information to know if Jay and Brian would be able to as well.

[maskintape]

Al.

[ You know that one stare that Tim does that's equal measures of "you dense motherfucker" and "I am dead inside"

HE'S DOING THAT

RIGHT NOW ]

You do not want me heading on into any place you give half a crap about. Unless you like people getting sick and going nuts and being stalked by spooky tree men.

[armoured]

Maybe another world holds the key to a cure, or maybe that thing wouldn't be able to follow you?

[You know how Al never gives up? Guess what he's doing now.]

It's worth looking into. Maybe you will have to stay here at the end of it all, but we don't know that yet, and you shouldn't consign yourself to it without all the answers.

[maskintape]

[ He'd like to point out that it followed him here, he's seen it, it will follow him everywhere, but for once he holds his tongue. Kinda. ]

I figure if I expect the worst then I won't get disappointed any more. Like the evil twin to your whole "there's always hope" attitude you've got going on. Complete with sinister facial hair.

[armoured]

I don't think that can be true, not deep down, or else you wouldn't be able to keep going. If you only think that the worst will happen, how can you have the hope and strength needed to keep fighting to live another day? You're not dead, so there's still hope.

[He has to believe that, he just does.]

[maskintape]

You've got it wrong. I'm still kicking because I'm a stubborn asshole who knows what it's like to be left alone.

So basically I screw hope and embrace spite, it does me just fine.

[armoured]

[He makes a faint noise that's half hum and half chuckle. He doesn't believe it, not really, but he's getting used to dealing with Tim now so it mostly just rolls off his back.]

You haven't seemed all that spiteful to me, but you're definitely stubborn. You kind of remind me of someone else I know.

[maskintape]

I swear to god, if the words "brother" or "short" even think about leaving your spooky ghost voice hole, I'm going to start reminding the entire network about that severe UTI of yours.

Seriously.

[armoured]

[He doesn't need to say it, but the burst of laughter probably does it for him.]

H-Hey, don't you dare, you know that's not really a thing at all!

[maskintape]

[ HE IS SO UNDAUNTED BY THIS. AL IS A LIL SHIT. ]

Shhh, I'm composing my next network post. Dear Norfinbury, a friend of mine has a dong dilemma...

[armoured]

[He can't stop laughing, though it does edge towards nervous laughter now.]

You wouldn't do something like that.

[maskintape]

[ CONTINUING UNABATED: ]

...a peen problem, if you will...

[armoured]

[He splutters, but then... two can play at this game.]

You know what? I think I need to talk to everyone too about this friend that I have. He acts all mean, but secretly he's a really nice guy and wants nothing more than for more people to make friends with.

[maskintape]

[ oh

HELL

no. ]

You're making this too easy. You try countering with that and I just explain to people that it's part of your tragic condition: you subconsciously block out any dicks around you to avoid any reminders of your... difficulty. That's why you think I'm nice.

I'm saying I'm a dick.

That's the joke.

[armoured]

[This is so embarrassing, though luckily he manages to hide just how flustered he is when he replies.]

It's so sad that this person I'm talking about makes things up in order to try and make people believe they're not nice, but they! They just really want everyone to keep trying and refuse to give up making friends with them.

[maskintape]

[ Okay, time to bring out THE BIG GUNS ]

So this kid - let's call him Blalphonse to preserve his anonymity - doesn't have an ass, either. That's why he's so preoccupied with staring at -

[ let's see, whose would be worst ]

- Spoiler's. You heard it here first, Snowhell.

[armoured]

W-What?!

[And the big guns hit their target, as Al is successfully distracted in mortification.]

You can't drag someone else into this! Besides, that's not true at all, I don't look at Steph's-- I don't look at Steph like that! Don't be such a pervert.

[maskintape]

I'm just talking about Blalphonse, man. But you know what they say about protesting too much, so...

[armoured]

Well... Blalphonse doesn't look at her that way either.

[Huff.]

Besides, I know you wouldn't say anything like that to everyone, you know why? Because you're too nice.

[maskintape]

[ Oh. That gets a raised eyebrow. ]

That sounds like a challenge to me. How sure are you?

[armoured]

[How sure is he? Not actually as sure as he could be, Tim can be kind of a jerk. But he can only give one reply. If he backs down now then it's as good as saying everything he's been saying about trust in friends is a lie.]

Totally sure.

[So there. Don't break that trust, man.]

[maskintape]

Welp. Don't say I didn't give you any warning.

[ There's only one way to deal with this.

Tim hangs up, and a few minutes later Al gets this in his inbox: http://snowblindrpg.dreamwidth.org/616673.html ]